lately “I am tired” has been my phrase of choice. I feel mistreated and I feel like God hasn’t heard my prayers. Maybe he has had them, maybe he is saying No! and I haven’t listened.

I know one day he will make it happen for me.. But the time doesn’t feel near. Since I had my child I have been waiting for that special family and it seems that not happening now.

I keep on trying to be in a serious relationship and it always go pear shaped. I am beginning to believe that something is wrong with me. It’s a very difficult pill to swallow.

My latest boyfriend has really turned into something else. He has now told me he is not ready for a serious relationship… Mind you my previous boyfriend said the same thing…and the one before that. This was after they pursued me like they were hungry.

What do I do wrong… I am at a loss of words. I am not bad looking… I am self sufficient and I don’t ask for much…all I need is that he spends time with me and apparently that’s too much to ask for…

As a teen mum… I am constantly in this loop… Like I am searching for something but never finding it. I constantly pray for Jesus to fix it… To fix me…

There is something seriously undesirable about me and Josh has told me that there is. I am so bitter… I just want to be okay… My weekends are awful and I cry constantly. At least now I know not to cry in front of my child.. But my pillow is soaked most nights.

I feel like I need to be in a relationship to complete me… But I am still not complete. How do I learn to just be happy by myself… To be content with my own being..,

i am so in pain.. And I am tired. I sometimes have suicidal thoughts but then I think about my child and I am forced to be strong…

please God fix it.,,